Beyond the barricade

‘I don’t think that I will ever be loved.’ She said.

‘And what made you think so?’ I asked.

‘I’m fat and I feel ugly.’

This is my friend’s story that I was narrating here. Okay, now you may say that that’s absurd and silly of her to think so, and trust me, that was my first reaction too. But now that I think of it, my friends, her point too is equally argumentative as is mine or yours. It’s natural for her to feel low about her heavy structure because that’s what we’ve been learning and grasping ever since our senses started working. We are told over and over from a young age that long and slim structure is feminine, desirable, and attractive. And since she lacks it all, well, it’s obvious on her part to feel that she will never be loved as a woman is loved by a man.

A perfect body is synonyms to beauty and the proof is here: Nobody finds oversize bodies attractive and that’s the reason why we barely see actors and models beyond the “zero size”.

Tell me how many of you would rather have the bulky lady instead of the skinny one star in your favorite movie (except if the movie is titled : I LOVE FAT)?


(c) Google image search


I guess that it’s not really easy to be the selves that we are when the society is not ready to accept that beauty confides not within the fixed boundaries of shapes and sizes. Note that I used “I guess” because I have never experienced that melancholic feeling of being fat myself. It’s hard to cope when you are constantly reminded that to be beautiful, you need a “perfect body”. And that is where all the miseries spring from. ….and it’s not just women who feel that way. Men too are as conscious of their body structure as are the women.

Let’s not make it hard for ourselves and for others to feel beautiful the way they are. When reaching Mars is not a big issue anymore, then why is being BIG still an issue that haunts many of our lives? That’s why I decided to come up with this post in the first place. I want to remind each one of you out there that you are beautiful.

The size of my body shouldn’t determine my worth as a person. I’ve haven’t given the power of judgement to anyone to measure me on the basis of my size, and now I get started to flaunt myself the way I am.


14 thoughts on “Beyond the barricade

  1. i was skinny once long ago and when i gained the weight i went a bit crazy about it, went through my depression and tried every fad diet out there. Finally one day when all hope was lost I met Him and he told me that I was beautiful and when we finally got to doing the deed as I was self conscious and trued covering up he kept reminding me that he wanted all of me and that he liked how I looked even if I didnt. That right there motivated me to lift my confidence, i started noticing after that many meb would start hitting on me. The way I carried myself with confidence was sexy not the weight i carried. I love this piece and I say to any woman that believes she is not worth a look because of her weight to love yourself regardless of size. a real man or woman loves you for you not your size and if you exhude confidence the right one will come along. As meghan trainor said , boys like a little more booty to hold at night. So work it girl.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Well said, mate!
      I think that the world is in urgent need of humans, and not of hollow skeletons who define the worth of people not by the size of their “bodies” but but the content they hold within.
      You made me laugh out there too, and that reminded me of another proverb: “Boys love girls, whereas dogs go for the bones.”

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Reblogged this on A peek into my Erotic Mind and commented:
    I needed to reblog this. As someone who has struggled with weight gain and weight loss or trying to lose i should say. I felt it important for everyone to know that I feel that the way the world is veiwing sexy now is changing or so I hope it is. Sure women get self conscious and think that being overweight is cause for isolation and desolation but I have found that there is an audience for us big girls and that you have to love yourself in all your glory before anyone else can appreciate it. I will write my story soon to explain my side if it but for now read this bloggers insight as to her friend’s struggle and howbthe writer addresses it.


  3. Hello, glad you stumbled upon my blog. Interesting thoughts you have, and to be honest people are people and since the ages of the Romans man and women like good looking people. I don´t want to stare at a commercial with a fat ugly guy or girl in it, nor would I want to stare at my face for that mater. Confidence comes from within, you may be ugly and still be the most confident person in the world. I don´t think one thing excludes the other.


  4. Preach it sister! As someone whose been both super skinny and rapidly put on more weight than i was comfortable with (boo hiss contraception). I totally understand the societal pressures and even worse the the feeling of knowing why weight makes you feel a certain way and yet still being unhappy about it!


    1. More than anything else, it’s the society and its narrow vision that I detest with all my heart. I think I’d rather live in Mars: no society, no pressure!
      But honestly,no on can make one feel down about the figure but oneself, so shine bright with the inner light!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Very true. We are taught from a very early age that only the beautiful people (slender and sexy) will have happy lives. But look closely at our society, folks. Hollywood is filled with “beautiful” people who have to do drugs or drink or sleep around in order to find the ever elusive happiness. It was a surprise to me when attending the only class reunion I’ve ever been to (the 20th) that the popular girls in school had been married and divorced, and their kids were out of control. I, the least likely to succeed or ever have a chance at happiness, have been happily married for 43 years, no divorce, and although our daughter gave us some grief for a while, she’s on the right track now. I’m not gloating; I’m sorry for what they’ve been through. The point is beauty doesn’t guarantee happiness. And my brother, God bless him, prefers big women. So if you are an overweight lady, don’t despair. God has someone for you who will appreciate you for who you are, not for your socially expected weight.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You have beautiful thoughts, Lady.
      Yes, it’s sad that today, one is judged by one’s outre beauty, but the real judgement lies in the hands of time..which judges on the basis of beauty that lies inside.
      I’m so glad to read your lovely and inspiring story. It touched the deepest core of my heart.
      Good wishes, Kanika. 🙂


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